Who says you can't go...

After almost one week on the job...working nights (10p-6a) then turning around and working days (5a-2p,) I am learning what this business is all about.

I keep telling all of those I work with that this is the first restaurant I've ever worked for that doesn't have a bar in it. Most don't believe me.

First job ever: 15 and a half: D&G Restaurant- St. Joseph, Mo. I was a hostess. I wanted to frame my first paycheck I was so damn proud. But then my parents told me I wouldn't be able to cash it...so I went to my mom's work and made a photocopy of it so I'd always remember that moment.

It was like $50.

After that I worked in a grocery store until I went to college. I wasn't old enough to ring alcohol...so I had to call a manager.

Freshman year in college, I worked at the Power Plant. When I wasn't serving beer, I was drinking whatever they'd serve me (except beer...yuck!!). I thought I was really cool.

Then, my first job behind the bar: The American Legion. What better way to serve your Country than to serve Vets? What a blast I had...until my mind and values got in the way.

Then onto Arrowhead where I served Carl, Dante, Trent and loads of others. But even that doesn't matter so much.

What matters is that I know my stuff.

I know what a customer wants, desires and needs when they walk in the door. No matter if they rush in at 6 a.m. or traipse in at 2 p.m. They want to be noticed, welcomed, thanked, served, and appreciated.

This knowledge of what a customer wants, deserves and needs is what made me realize that maybe...just maybe...this is what I should really be doing right now...

Not writing for the Star, the Post, or the Sun...

Not starring on the 10 o'clock news.

I need to be serving the community...one customer at a time.

Sound familiar?

This is what leads me to this blog.

Maybe this is my ticket.

I've wanted to be in Florida for over a year now. Desperately exhausting every source I have to get me in the sun, heat and away from the issues in Missouri. Maybe Panera, or food service in general...is my ticket.

This has been my internal question for more than eight months now. What would happen if one day, I picked up and left? Would the world end?

No. It wouldn't.

Maybe, I just might live out my dreams of spending some time in a strange place, alone, trying to figure it out on my own, just so in 20, 30, 40 years, I don't regret that I never did it.

Recent activities with my family have led me to question what I always thought to be true. I wonder now what exactly marriage means. Do I really need to be married to have a child? While that is ideal, it is not necessary. While it may be expected, appreciated, and approving of me to stay in the Kansas City area to be around for people, for morale, friendship, and companionship, does it mean I should? Are any of those people who want me to stay going to be awake with me in 20 years when I'm questioning my life's path? Why I'm not married? Why I don't have kids? Why I haven't "figured it out?"

No. They aren't.

So why should I wait?

I recently told Racheal that if I had to do it all over again, I would have been out of Kansas City, on the highway to Florida in May. I told her that I couldn't pull that off now, but if I could, I would.

That was before I knew that I could.

Now...my biggest question is... WHAT'S STOPPING ME?

me